"It's painful to think that we know what's best for our children. It's hopeless."
Well, there it is, the most confounding Byron Katie quote ever. But it's so true, and yet I have not accepted it, as anyone could see by watching me live.
Anyway, I try to keep this in mind when I'm thinking Ezra is making the wrong choice by waiting in the car instead of coming in somewhere, or when he would rather stay inside than go outside to play, or when he is dying to watch a space shuttle video on YouTube. And I feel like he's watched too many already.
But, of course I really have no idea who he is going to become.
A few years ago, when I was depressed and had been for a long time, the thought suddenly popped into my head, "I could be a cartoonist!" In that moment, my entire life up to that point suddenly made sense. Suddenly all the "struggle" and the seemingly pointless winding path I had taken was explained. I even got to be proud that I spent 6 hours a day, 5 days a week in junior high and high school doodling, daydreaming, and passing notes. Why, that is *just* what a cartoonist would do!
So often I think, we will look back on all of these things and realize that Ezra knew what was best for himself. Or, at least that's what Byron Katie would say, I think.
Friday, March 6, 2009
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